Monday, August 22, 2011

Scott, Guest Poster of The FUTURE!

First, on behalf of Sheri and Mary (the perhaps justifiably forgotten folk-pop duo of the mid-Sixties), I'd like to say thanks for the many kind wishes on the occasion of our collective anniversary.  You guys are the reason World O' Crap has remained a persistent blemish on the lower left butt cheek of the blogosphere for the last eight years.

Second, the Winner and Runners-up of the Miss Wingnut 2011 Pageant will be posted tomorrow.  One day late, I know, but the announcement has been pre-empted so that we may bring you the following Special Program:

The Fabulous Stacia, of She Blogged By Night, has gone on strike, demanding better working conditions at her blog (including two weeks vacation, which she will probably just spend blogging anyway -- the woman's a machine!).  But she has hired a distinguished panel of scabs to cross the picket line and post on her behalf; this week it's my turn, and I'm offering up a Better Living Through Bad Movies treatment of 1983's Yor, the Hunter From the Future, starring Reb Brown as the post-Apocalypse's Smuggest Barbarian.
Now we know where Mark Steyn got his patented "Smoldering Come Hither" look, except Reb Brown's version is so powerfully sexy it's actually flammable.

For more of Mr. Brown's gallery of manly expressions, and some of the goofiest action in movie history, please click here.

9 comments:

Stacia said...

Lord, the thought of Steyn in the Yor wig gives me the dry heaves.

Carl said...

Did Yor not play Moog in Haircut 100?

Li'l Innocent said...

Gosh, Scott, I read your whole review on She Blogged, and I still don't understand that ghostly big hand that's reaching for Yor's hair/shoulder/throat in the pic above. Have you been having fun with the actual sequence of events in this movie, at all?

My own most memorable encounter with the world of dino-slaying cavemen was when, as a 9 or 10 year old, I sat in the waiting room of my family's dentist, Dr. Turok. There on the table with the Woman's Days, etc. was a recent issue of the comic "Turok, Son of Stone". But Turok, IIRC, was tougher than Yor, at least according to your reportage.. if that's to be trusted.

Scott said...

Li'L, you wound me! As you know, we pride ourselves on the accuracy of our movie plot reportage, but some things are necessarily cut for space (my original draft of the post ran over 3500 words).

The scene pictured above takes place in the cave (no, not that cave, the other cave. No, the other other cave) when Miss Clairol condemns Yor to death. As a Mud Dude gently reaches up to pull our hero's head down onto the chopping block, he shoots his female doppelganger a flirty look. Then he grabs a flaming sword that some guy carried in a few seconds earlier as part of some one-man Catholic processional, and starts setting everybody on fire (please refer to Paragraph 21).

Stacia said...

Also, the pictures on Scott's guest post don't necessarily go with the text right near them. I was trying to spread the screencaps out so they weren't clumping together like a JV football team, but did so at the cost of continuity.

Scott said...

but did so at the cost of continuity.

Fine, but what was the director's excuse?

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

I could've sworn that this picture was actually Dana Carvey trying to make a comeback with a remake of that Ringo Starr caveman p.o.s.... Though the nose is a bit too ugly for even Dana, bless his short little heart...

Lancelot Link said...

A couple scary/revealing bits of Yor trivia;
-It has some of the same cast and locations as Turkish Star Wars.
-The original version is 3 1/2 hours long.

Scott said...

LL: I knew it was shot in Turkey, but didn't know it was lens on hallowed ground.

I read that Yor was actually a mini-series made for Italian TV -- is that the 3½ version? It would certainly explain why a whole new plot seems to start about 2/3rds of the way through (it suggests the deft editing style of Sandy Frank).