Today’s scuba-dive to Townhall.com scooped up Ms. Katie Kieffer, a "conservative multimedia personality, writer and public speaker." In today's feature she offers her cogent and deeply-moving opinions on theology and its symbiosis with late capitalism.
I contend that if you profess to believe in gravity, you must also embrace practical, comfortable foot-wear (reasonably priced, of course).
I contend that if you profess to believe in God, you must also embrace capitalism.
Lately, many religious shepherds are abandoning reason in favor of sentiment. Catholic nuns are joining Occupy Wall Street revelers, like zombies witnessing to rapturous fans. Meanwhile, Jewish activist and commentator Jake Goodman is hailing the Manhattan demonstration (which includes numerous blatantly anti-Semitic protesters) as a group of people ‘philanthropizing [sic.] with their feet.
Hello, we are Sisters from the Scared Order of the Immaculate Brains. In order to fulfill our philanthropic mission, do consider donating to our sensible, reasonably-priced footwear fund. Also, kindly consider donating your brains for lunch, as we are very hungry.
If you believe that God created the universe, then you must assume that he wanted man to live differently from animals. Otherwise, man would not have reason. Upon realizing that reason both defines and differentiates man, wouldn’t you set logic―not sensation―as the moral compass for human activity? Or would you “shepherd the flock” by encouraging young people to bully job creators, embrace sloth, strut topless in Manhattan and openly mate in parks?[I thought the strutting, topless sloths were were driven out of New York when Giuliani cleaned up Times Square, and shut down all the Xenarthran peep shows.--ed.]
Squirrels scamper about and get frisky in public parks. Squirrels are also feral; they will never cultivate the land, own property, develop iPhones or create a monetary system. I think humans who reject reason by acting like squirrels have no business preaching about God.
Hate to break the news but there are no more squirrels in Zuccotti Park (B'way & Liberty St.) The topless, licentious zombie nun convocations have slaughtered the entire squirrel population of the financial district, tossing the once-scampering, frisky and now brainless squirrel corpses onto the trash-heap where they shall burn in Hell for eternity. (And just as they were on the cusp of figuring out a fiat currency based on acorns.)
I find that atheists admit the metaphysical more than progressives who claim to believe in God. For, atheists revere reason while progressive “believers” adore emotion: They shop around until they find a church that washes them mindless with foolishly sentimental and entertaining services. They make themselves feel charitable by marching two-by-two past wealthy residences in midtown Manhattan with signs like “No Billionaire Left Behind.” They interpret the eighth commandment that God gave to Moses as: ‘Thou shalt share.’ ”
Thank you, Ms. Kieffer; as an atheist I like the occasional acknowledgment that I'm on the side of reason. And no better method to be “washed mindless” than by topless zombie nuns who mate in public with the sentimentally-inclined, whilst playing whack-a-mole for squirrel brains. (Actually, Ms. Kieffer, those are “Manhattan” squirrels, i.e., rats. But they’re every bit as frisky and feral, as well as cute.)
Now, dear readers, before continuing take a deep breath. Don’t hyperventilate, mind, but do get some extra oxygen.
Aristotelian philosopher and theologian Thomas Aquinas contends that all men are governed by a natural law that is rooted in reason, not emotion. He argues thus in his Treatise on Law [ed. Summa Theologica]: ‘As, in man, reason rules and commands the other powers, so all the natural inclinations belonging to the other powers must needs be directed according to reason. Wherefore it is universally right for all men, that all their inclinations should be directed according to reason.’
Capitalism acknowledges reason and natural law whereas socialism denies natural law. By reason, we know that we have the right to own private property and the fruits of our labor. Capitalism is rational because it allows you to keep the fruits of your labor.
As John Locke points out, reason tells you that you own your body. No one else owns your body―not your neighbors, your family or the government. If you use your body to till the land and make it useful by growing wheat, then logic tells you that you own the land and any profits from the wheat, not the hungry passerby who comes across the land and steals the wheat that you grew.
Mr. Locke also implies by reason that you own your brains. No derelict undead nun may demand you surrender them. Your brains are your property. (Shotgun to the head is all that works in this scenario.)
But, Ms. K, you and your ancestors didn’t exactly use your own bodies to till the land and make it useful, did you? You used other people’s bodies ... either from the workhouse of indentured servitude or outright slavery ... to till that land. In the rare instance where you tried to till it you ended up like Ty Ty Walden in God’s Little Acre, digging ditches all over the place to grab grandpa’s buried treasure.
Rational men glorify God just as glowing candles glorify a candlestick maker; men must behave rationally in order to completely function and prosper―just as candles must hold a flame in order to fulfill their purpose of brightening a room. Said differently, a man that acts like an animal must be as disappointing to his maker as a candle that cannot hold a flame.
So, as you have stated, Atheists: 1; Believers: nill. Ms. Kieffer, what on earth are you smoking?