Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Happy (Belated) Birthday, Dr. BDH! I Blame Obamacare.

Friday, October 4th was the birthday of Wo'C Chief Medical Officer Dr. BDH, but unfortunately, due to the government shut-down, I was unable to post a birthday greeting, under pain of a beating by a Park Ranger.  Granted, she was kind of a smallish, mild-mannered woman, and she didn't actually threaten me so much as she just sort of stood next to a sawhorse in front of the World War II Memorial -- but she was clearly unashamed!  And that inevitably leads to being naked and unashamed.  Plus, she was wearing a campaign hat, and you know who also wore a campaign hat but was otherwise naked?  Smokey the Bear!  And bears can maul and even eat you.  Ever seen Grizzly Man?  Or worse, Catching Trouble?

So while failing to post punctual birthday greetings is, admittedly, a breach of the social contract, I think we can all agree that I had legitimate reason to fear for my life, and therefore I should just be let off with a warning.

As for the traditional birthday cheesecake photo, the good Doctor has requested that I forgo the usual Sexy Birthday Lizard, no doubt because he has a sentimental attachment to the human-reptile hybrids he builds in his lab at the World O' Crap World O' Headquarters, and doesn't enjoy seeing their relatives exploited.

However, since Tommy T has conclusively identified the mystery automaton below as "Robert the Robot," I thought we should further develop the theme with a photo of Sean Young in her second best role (after Stripes), as Rachael the Replicant in Blade Runner.
"Why worry about lung cancer when you've got a four year lifespan anyway?"

Speaking of warnings, beware: Ellis Washington ahead.
With the official launching of Obamacare on Oct. 1st, I am reminded of the famous aphorism attributed to playwright George Bernard Show, "The more things change, the more they stay the same." Have we learned nothing from history?
Well, we haven't learned that the famous aphorism was actually coined by French critic and novelist Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr, but as longtime readers know, an unfailing ability to misattribute quotes is pretty much the hammer in Ellis' rhetorical toolbox.
Who is the real father of universal healthcare? 
We performed a paternity test but ironically, thanks to Obamacare, we won't get the results back for another six weeks.
Otto von Bismarck, the Chancellor of Germany (1871-90), established the world's first welfare state in Germany. In 1883, Bismarck established socialized healthcare in Germany with the Reichsversicherungsverordnung or Reich Insurance Act...
Bismarck's institution of socialized healthcare was designed to co-opt the increasing popularity of Marxist socialism and to implement its anti-God, anti-capitalism ideas spreading throughout Europe in the late 1800¡äs. 
So Bismarck, who was a devout Lutheran, tried to stop godless communism by implementing it?  I guess this makes Obama a secret Prussian.  Pass the word to the tea party poster makers: nix on the Hitler mustaches!  All we have to do now is Photoshop the President with one of those big walrus 'staches and a spiked helmet, and we'll turn sauerkraut back into "liberty cabbage" before the 2014 midterms!
Modeling his government in part after the dictatorship of his predecessor, Otto von Bismarck, it was Adolf Hitler (1933-45) who actually forced socialized healthcare on the entire German people as a part of a comprehensive, systematic nazification of the German nation including its healthcare industry.
At the same time, Hitler also loosened restrictions on private gun ownership, which suggests that he owned stock in for-profit hospitals and was just trying to drum up business, the way itinerate glazier Charlie Chaplin (who also wore a Hitler mustache!) had Jackie Coogan throw rocks through windows in The Kid.
For this cause, Adolf Hitler must be considered one of the founding fathers of universal healthcare, along with the Soviet Union who had by 1921 established a universal healthcare system.
In much the same way, Wilhelm IV, Duke of Bavaria established the German Beer Purity Law in 1516, and therefore must be considered one of the founding fathers of the FDA, so if you're still pissed that you can't get cyclamate in your Sugar Twin, take it up with His Grace.
One aspect of Hitler's socialist universal healthcare model was "racial hygiene," the removal of certain "undesirable" segments of society who are judged beneath the Aryan ideal, thus "life unworthy of existence," as Hitler believed. Using his brutal panzer divisions, Hitler literally rolled out his universal healthcare throughout occupied France, Belgium and the Netherlands – those nations with mainly "Aryan" populations. Hitler used his military thugs the Gestapo and SS Stormtroopers, to implement universal healthcare
No one who lived through the 1940 invasion of France can forget the German's brilliant use of blitzkoloskopie, or "lightning-colonoscopy" tactics, and even today, few French veterans can sit down without a wince of remembrance.
Of course I do not contend that Obama is Hitler
This picture, which was included with both the RenewAmerica and slightly different WorldNetDaily versions of Ellis' article, notwithstanding.
But if America foolishly adopt policies of national socialism then we fail to learn from history the innumerable grotesqueries, inhumanity and genocide of previous nations who tried universal healthcare.
Ellis isn't saying that Obama is Hitler, just that he stole all of Hitler's ideas, which makes him even worse -- a hipster Hitler poseur, or "Hipler." Anyway, I guess I can forget that lifelong dream of taking a trip to Sweden, since apparently the whole country is now just a desolate wasteland after they all killed each other with free mammograms.
To grant governments this god-like power over birth, life and death issues will be misused, perhaps not exactly as it was in Nazi Germany yet these antecedents were merely harbingers of our present enslavement under Obamacare.
Ah, so the Affordable Care Act is actually worse than the Holocaust.  I should've known when I went to Urgent Care for one of my cluster headaches and the doctor prescribed a 10 mg tablet of Zyklon-B, taken once a day at shower time.
This genocide was conducted not out of evil intent but born out of medical necessity. Hitler, in his official directives, allowing medical killing, called them “mercy killing” and “lives not worth living.”
Actually, Ellis, I think that any genocide, by definition, is born of evil intent, and that whole "medical necessity" business was just spin.  In any case, I wouldn't be inclined to take Hitler's word for anything, and if he tries to sell you his old Volkswagon, I'd suggest you double-check to make sure the heater works.
This is the inevitable diabolical nature of universal health care.
You know, if you've reached the point in life when you can no longer distinguish between such concepts as "requiring insurance companies to cover persons with pre-existing conditions" and "genocide," you really ought to get out of the business of right wing blogging and seriously think about running for a Congressional seat in Georgia.
Did Hitler do this because he was so worried about the health of the people and nations he conquered? No, Hitler loved universal health care so excessively that he forced it on occupied countries because it gave him the power and control over entire classes of people to facilitate his ghastly plans of genocide against them.
It's the same reason we don't execute the insane.  Not out of some misplaced sense of mercy, or an effeminate respect for global standards of decency, but because, if you're going to kill someone, you want them to be healthy enough to fully experience their own murder.  Otherwise, what's the point?  It's like when you're just on the point of orgasm, and your mom calls you from the other room, and you have to hastily stuff the Clare Boothe Luce Institute "Great American Conservative Women" calendar under the mattress (and right when you'd gotten to the Jan Brewer page, too!).
“We are five days away from fundamentally transforming the United States of America.” These were the words of treason Obama uttered on the eve of his election that he and his progressive minions have been now systematically implementing for almost six years.
Obama is a decent orator, but frankly, those aren't the most inspiring words of treason I've ever heard. Philip Nolan did it so much better.
Hitler would be pleased.
As history records, there is nothing that pleased the Führer more than the sight of a transformative Negro, unless it was semolina noodles in a light tomato sauce, with a nice rice pudding for dessert.
Since the Founders of America's Republic understood that humanity is by nature anti-God, hypocritical and duplicitous they created a system of checks and balances and limitations of government power because they realized someday a dictator like a Barack Obama would arise and seize power in the United States for himself by ignoring or deconstructing the U.S. Constitution.
The Founders were indeed farsighted, but not, alas, clairvoyant.  While Jefferson, for instance, correctly foresaw the day in which there would be a Black person in the White House, he assumed it'd be someone he was banging behind his wife's back.
Nazi Germany is the true birthplace, and Hitler, the real father of universal healthcare and like Lenincare, Stalincare, Maocare, Castrocare and Obamacare, all universal healthcare systems are derivative of Marxism, socialism, communism, progressivism, postmodernism and thus are antithetical to America's founding constitutional principles of God, the Bible, natural law, equality, liberty and truth.
Apparently the suffix "-care" now serves the same purpose for death as "-gate" does for scandal.  Was someone gunned down in a drive-by shooting?  He was a victim of GangCare.  Did she perish from tainted chicken that went uninspected thanks to the government shutdown?  Cause of death: e coliCare.  Run down by a drunk driver?  CarCare.
Like Hitlercare, Obamacare which will inevitably lead to healthcare rationing, death panels, millions of uninsured and eventually the systematic genocide of the weak, minorities, enfeebled, the elderly and political enemies of the God-state.
To be fair, that's still better service than I get from Blue Shield.
Obama is using his Gestapo and SS Stormtroppers or so-called "Navigators" (e.g., the youth, the unions, Planned Parenthood, NAACP, ACORN, La Raza, the Democratic Socialist Party apparatus, etc.) to propagandize the poor, the mis-educated and minorities who are being exploited to lead this final blitzkrieg towards accepting universal healthcare, but like in Hitler's Germany once the reality of their treachery metastasizes, guess who will be the first ones forced to sacrifice their lives for the Fatherland in our march towards a "perfect" society without illness or suffering? History has repeatedly demonstrated that the weakest and most vulnerable have often been the first victims to be eliminated.
Anyway, please join me in wishing Dr. BDH a very happy birthday, because thanks to ObamaCare he now has the power to kill us, but if we're really nice to him, he might kill us last.

15 comments:

Li'l Innocent said...

Many happy re-occurrences, Doc! I hope the ACA will treat you and all your patients nicely!

As to that article, Scott....
Holy Molucca, as Miss Piggy often said. I don't know what you'd call the mental country Ellis dwells in, but remind me never to go there.

However -- and with no desire to step on anybody's quips -- I must rise to the defense of one T. Jefferson, who, by Wikipedia's account anyway, didn't start sleeping with Sally Hemmings until well after the death of his wife at the age of 33. They had apparently been a happy couple. She was seriously ill for quite a while, and he promised her he would never remarry, a promise he kept. He reportedly shut himself up for weeks after she died. The relationship with Sally Hemmings is thought to have begun 7-8 years later.

An It-Was-Different-Then note: Sally Hemmings and Jefferson's wife Martha Wayles were half-sisters. Martha's wealthy planter father John Wayles was the father of Sally. Sally and her family were inherited by the Jeffersons as part of the Wayles plantation when John Wayles died.

Anonymous said...

Holy analogies, Godwin !
Enjoy your special day, Doc, obviously this year is going to be a busy one for medics, what with all the genodicin' and so forth.
Er.. you DID sign up for the socialism option, right?
Suezboo

D. Sidhe said...

Happy birthday, Doc! Admit it, this whole Obamacare thing was a clever time travel plot to intimidate us with death panels into not making you look at a sexy birthday lizard.

We're through the looking glass here, people! Someone call Sarah Palin!

Anyway, I hope you've been able to spend the last few days drunk, though not so drunk you have created an army of killer robots with sharks with lasers on their heads on their heads. Mad science is confusing enough without that.

Waiiiit.... Why am I being asked to prove I'm not a robot? This goes all the way to the top! Wake up, sheeple! Blow out those candles! Put on those party hats! Or else! Mwahahaha!

miken said...

Wow, I wonder if he has elves on his planet.

Ivan G Shreve Jr said...

You know, if you've reached the point in life when you can no longer distinguish between such concepts as "requiring insurance companies to cover persons with pre-existing conditions" and "genocide," you really ought to get out of the business of right wing blogging and seriously think about running for a Congressional seat in Georgia.

Scott...I'm begging you, man - don't give this guy any ideas.

I read Ellis' essay (nice website title, by the way...oy) with some amusement because the "Nazis had universal healthcare" argument is kind of similar to the GOTea braying "Obama is negotiating with dictators, but he won't talk to us!" (You're really not helping your cause, guys.)

Anyway...happy belated birthday, Doc. Even though I think Sean Young's finest film role is in A Kiss Before Dying, I'm glad our gracious host was able to fete your natal anniversary in style.

Weird Dave said...

"Hipler."

I bow before you.

(and right when you'd gotten to the Jan Brewer page, too!).

Now, I hate you.

And Doctor? Please be sure to kill me first.

Carl said...

Happy birthday. B-DitcH! I'm sad you didn't get a lizard for your birthday.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Happy, Happy, BDH!...lizard or no.
~

Dr.BDH said...

Thanks for the greetings, guys. I'll put in a word with the death panels for all of you.

Scott, that Ross guy, he's sort of the original Turtle Man. Is that who brought you Riley?

Scott said...

Ha! If Ross had gotten anywhere near Riley, she would have sliced and diced him like a teppanyaki chef. (Then gone back to watching MST3K. Because she has discriminating taste in television.)

grouchomarxist said...

Shorter Ellis Washington:

1. Industry-friendly minor reforms to totally fecked health-care system ("Is dis a system?")

2. ????????

3. It's ACORN and the Obamacare SS! They're coming for you! You're next!

Yes, the Nazis were famous for forcing people at gunpoint to go to the doctor. I think I could huff a dry-cleaning bag full of Easy Off and get whacked upside the head a couple of times with a 2 X 4 -- and still make more sense. Sorry Ellis, but the bark-at-the-moon wingnut token black guy spot's already been taken by Allan West.

Happy B-day, Dr. BDH! I hope you guys can at least come up with something more in line with modern tastes in entertainment for your death panels. Maybe like the Carousel in Logan's Run. Now that would be cool ...

Doc Logan said...

Late to the party as usual, but I hope Dr. BDH had a fantastic birthday. I know a Sexy Birthday Replicant must have helped.

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

Sorry to be so late to the party, Dr. BDH, but darlin', I know that you know that I was thinking about you the whole time!

I hope that your birfday was one great big bacchanalian blowout, strewn with giant jewel-toned velvet orgy-pillows & THE plushest rugs (rug-burn-PROOF!) populated by all of your favorite purdy peoples ("purdy," of course, is defined by every unique individual as per her or his personal proclivities, so nobody go assuming that I was being snotty!), all joyous, happy, high, drunk, whatever works, as long as nobody passes out!

And yes, of course, you would have a big, gorgeous, faux-gold-leaf (iPods are sucking-up all of the fucking gold on earth, so why get into THAT clusterfucked market?!?!) & blood-red upholstery THRONE, as teh ruleth-uber-alles Birfday-Boy dominator/king sub (whatever floats yer boat, darlin'!)!!!

What?

Too precise?

Well, fuck, it's a BIRFDAY ORGY WISH, fer fuck's sake, you don't wanna just wind-up with ANY OLD POLYESTER CRAP, now wouldja?!?!? Whatever makes you happy, Doc, that's what I hope that you got & keep getting, by the truckload!

Hugs & knishes & happy-happy joy-joy!
XOXOXO
Yer Ranty Aunty Annti

Woodrowfan said...

wow, happy REALLY BELATED Birthday. sorry, I've not been visiting WoC as much as I should. I will not make that mistake again.,...

Scott said...

I should hope not, sir!