Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Happy Birthday, Preznit!

I'm sorry this is a bit late in the day, but my keyboard died over the weekend, and I only just now got a replacement -- a cheap, plastic model with a weird clackety action that feels a bit like I'm trapped in Fort Zinderneuf as hostile Berbers close in, desperately tapping out messages on a PlaySkool My First Telegraph Key. Be that as it may, it's an auspicious occasion, the birthdate of one of our nation's most believed chief executives, and since Congress has not seen fit to make this a Federal Holiday (thanks, no doubt, to systematic gridlock and the kind of political posturing and obstructionism of which both parties are equally guilty!), it falls once again to us, his friends at World O' Crap, to thank him for his service -- either here, with words, or in the gift shop of his Presidential Library, where you can declare your support by purchasing a lovely foam rubber keychain float for your bass boat, tastefully embossed with the Presidential Seal on one side, and the Articles of Impeachment on the other.

The man of whom I speak is, of course, preznit giv me turkee, perhaps America's finest Post-War preznit. In addition to his bold and decisive actions while in office, he's also had a distinguished post-preznidential career, and like Jimmy Carter, has dedicated himself to a life of service. Specifically, he started the revolt against the posting of Ann Coulter pictures on birthdays by disabling images on the blog. Only history can judge whether this gesture, or Carter's Habitat for Humanity, ultimately proved more beneficial for mankind.

Instead, this year we're going with two sexy, sexy people who share preznit's birthday. First up, Selena Gomez:
Who despite her apparent lack of clothes seems to be a nice, polite, well-behaved young lady who is simply trying to remind us to use sunscreen in order to avoid the heartbreak of shoulder freckles and late-life melanomas.

Next, Bobby Sherman:
Who despite his apparent lack of clothes also appears to be a nice young man with that Dry Look the kids are so keen on, and who seems to share Selena's concern for the long term health of our shoulder skin.

Anyway, as those who know him know, Preznit is a wise and witty commenter, a sincerely nice person, and a Crapper of long standing, so please join me in wishing him the very Happiest of Birthdays.

Now everyone join hands as we close with the traditional...
Sexy Birthday Lizard!

17 comments:

Bill S said...

Have a super-spectacular birthday, Preznit!

Sheri said...

Let me echo Scott's eloquent words (it's much easier than writing my own), and also wish you a very happy birthday with a photo of another person who shares your natal day, Prince Philip the Handsome. Okay, I can't really post the photo here, but Google it and you will see that standards of handsomeness have apparently changed over the centuries. Back then, Ann Coulter could probably have been "Ann the Almost Tolerable, Except for her Personality."

Have a great day!

Jacquie said...

Hello during a random internet comment, the month and date of which coincide with your expulsion from a uterus, Preznit! Have a good birthday and enjoy that sexy, sexy birthday lizard.

Li'l Innocent said...

Wow, Preznit, you get a sexy human male, sexy human female, and sexy lizard too. You rate! Must be a perk of high office! Happy Emergence
Day (thx, Jacquie), and many of them.

Li'l Innocent said...

On Prince Philip the Handsome - compared to other members of his lineage saddled with extremer versions of the Hapsburg Lip, he was George Clooney.

maryclev said...

Happiest of Happy Birthdays, Preznit! (Would you have liked a pic of Nathan Fillion? Juat that I noticed a pic of Bobby Sherman, so...I know he shares your birthday and all, but...you know...Nathan Fillion, and all!)

Doc Logan said...

A most joyous birthday indeed to Preznit, a cornerstone of the Crapiverse. It is well known that an SBL bearing a strawberry hued wattle is a sign of good fortune, so you've got that going for you, which is nice.

preznit said...

thanks all, I guess it's in honour of President Obama signing the Executive Order banning federal workplace discrimination based on gender identity and sexual orientation that we now have species orientation added to the mix. just remember john cornyn and rick santorum warned us this day was coming and I welcome our reptile overlords ;}

Weird Dave said...

...trapped in Fort Zinderneuf as hostile Berbers close in, desperately tapping out messages on a PlaySkool My First Telegraph Key

We're not?

Happy Birthday Mr. Preznit. Or should that be Mr. Turkee?

preznit said...

mr preznit is fine. it got shortened when FireDogLake moved to their new comments section years ago ;}

grouchomarxist said...

WoC: Come for the lizard cheesecake, and stay for the comments.

Happy B-Day, Mr. P! May your next year contain more than the federally mandated minimum of A-days.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Hippo Birdie!

P.S. What a spectacular lizard.
~

Carl said...

PREZ! Happy birthday, Man!

Helmut Monotreme said...

Happy birthday! You must be extra special given the flamboyant exuberance of the birthday lizard.

Chris Vosburg said...

Happy Birthday, preznit, and keep 'em comin'.

Dr.BDH said...

Happy Birthday, Preznit!
That lizard has the best dewlap since Fred Thompson!

Anonymous said...

Whoa. That SBL is getting some hot LTL action today - check the wattle on that guy.Whooeee.
Hope the same is true of you, Preznit. Why, I remember the very circumstances under which your nym was inspired. How it takes me back - and to think you are having a birthday now - aww. Snif.
Hope it was a good one , preznit, and have a groovy year.
Suezboo